International Men's Day

The 19th of November is being celebrated the world over as International Men’s Day (IMD) since the year 1999. Every year, the number of countries celebrating IMD keeps growing, and last year, the number reached 80.

As the former President of India, Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, rightly said, “When surrounded by day to day issues, there is a tendency to forget the good things we are bestowed with.”

It is not easy to talk about men’s issues. Men have become victims of the stereotype in which they are the stronger sex and have to deal with their issues silently and prove their manhood. The world is changing and Men too have to adapt to the changing environment in which they are increasingly being discriminated.

The world is focused on women or girl’s issues but they don’t live in isolation from men. We have to progress by steering away from the idea of focusing on women’s or children's issues by excluding men. We need to have a safe world for everyone. It is high time that we address the issues faced by men and boys. 

While we see a handful of men constantly being idolized as heroes, and many film stars and sports stars being felicitated by the society, there are countless number of invisible heroes who make positive contributions to the community, society, family, marriage, child care and the environment. 

• These men include sanitation workers, construction workers, chemical and gas factory workers, mechanics and miners who routinely suffer from chronic occupational health issues and often die before they reach the age of 60. 

• They include soldiers, firefighters, land mine removers, deep sea fishermen, electric linemen, house painters and glass cleaners who risk their lives every day. 

• They include farmers, weavers, tea sellers, drivers, paperboys, mailmen and watchmen, who render their services, often without receiving a word of recognition or gratitude. 

• They include teachers, doctors, scientists, engineers, entrepreneurs and public servants, who help improve the quality of life for everyone in the society. 

• They include fathers, grandfathers, brothers, husbands, friends and colleagues who stand by us, inspire us, make us laugh and enrich our lives. 

• They include men in all walks of life who live honest, decent lives and help keep the wheels of progress and hope turning. 

It is often forgotten that everywhere in the world, men perform a variety of tasks, including some of the most difficult and daunting jobs, to protect and provide for their families. It is often forgotten that doing these jobs is more of a necessity than a choice for men. The goodness and selflessness of these men is often taken for granted.

This year’s International Men’s Day theme will be same as that of last year – Working Together For Men and Boys – which is designed to encourage greater cooperation in addressing issues that affect Men and Boys such as men’s shorter life expectancy, the high male suicide rate, our collective tolerance of violence against men, domestic violence, bias in family courts and the unique challenges of father-child relationships.

Male Suicide Pandemic

Men commit suicide at double the rate of women across all ages and marital status. Male suicide is increasing at an alarming rate year on year. According to NCRB (National Crime Records Bureau of Home Ministry of India), 89129 men and 42521 women committed suicide in year 2014. This is clearly a prime indicator of the ground level situation of men-folk in India. Every life is precious. Suicide help lines have to be made available so as to provide suicide prevention counselling and mental health support services. The root causes behind the suicides have to be analysed and addressed.

Health

It has been found that Men neglect or ignore their health issues. Health care is utilized more by Women as they are conscious of their health. Men die sooner and live sicker than women. Men suffer from 15 leading causes of death and die at higher rates than women. The average life expectancy of a woman in India is 67.5 years, whereas that of a man is 63.4 years. Indian women are expected to stay healthy till 57.1 years, whereas an Indian man is expected to stay healthy till 54.6 years.

Media

Domestic and sexual violence against men is underplayed by the media. Men are unfairly stereotyped as violent sexual predators. Violence against men is glorified but the same is considered a heinous crime against women. The portrayal of the modern-day husband and father as lazy, incompetent and stupid is quite prevalent on TV. The kind of things that are done with men in the media would never be done with women. The men don’t mind as they live by joking and putting each other down and lifting each other up. This can be fine only if the rest of the society has a basic understanding and respect for boys and men.

Violence and Domestic Abuse

In a war, more than 90% casualties are men. More than 80% murder/homicide victims are men. Boys are more likely to be beaten or given harsher punishment at school than girls. Male genital mutilation like female genital mutilation should also be condoned.

Surveys showed that 40% of men have been victims of domestic abuse. They have no means to lodge a complaint or seek relief. We continue to see men who are abused by women as pathetic, unmanly and are not sympathetic towards them. Victims are victims, no matter who they are.

Education

More boys are dropping out of school as they are forced to work for the family’s sustenance. Higher education will become distant for boys as the focus is more on girls and soon a time will come when the work force will have more women than men.

Fatherhood
A healthy mix of maternity and paternity leave will go a long way in nurturing children as most are nuclear families. Stay-at-Home Dads are looked down. Men contribute to nurturing the new born, staying up nights and still going to work the next day as they still have the responsibility of being the provider.

Fathers are navigating a family court system that unfairly privileges mothers in divorce. Men too are adept at parenting and the children should have both parents so that they can have constructive role models. In a land where we have the axiom Matru Devo Bhava, Pitru Devo Bhava we cannot let fathers leading a life without having access to their children post-divorce.

This International Men’s Day let us 

• Remember all the good things about men and boys around us. 
• Acknowledge and celebrate the invisible heroes of everyday. 
• Honor them for all their positive contributions to the world. 
• Pray for their health, well-being and safety. 
• Vow to ensure fairness towards men and boys in all walks of life. 
• Join hands to end misandry and to restore respect for masculinity. 

Let us join on 19th November in celebrating the contributions men and boys make to those around them, to their family and friends, their workplace and the community, the nations and the world.

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