Parents strive and sacrifice a lot in trying to get their children the best education, starting from Kindergarten, with a hope that their children will either become an Engineer or a Doctor and will have a good life.
A boy growing up in India often keeps hearing - Study Hard, Play Hard, Work Hard - You will have a great life! The first priority always being studies.
Once the boy starts earning and is doing well in his career, the inevitable question comes. When are you going to marry and settle down in life? The societal pressure won't stop until the boy marries. Most of the Indian movies used to end with a wedding with the implicit assumption of the couple living happily ever after. Nobody shows the life after marriage. There is a Hindi saying that marriage is like Shaadi ka ladoo jo na khaaye woh pachtaye, jo khaaye woh bhi pachtaaye!
Few even describe a marriage as that of being a Merger and not an Acquisition in management terminology. What happens in reality? The reality is far from it either being a Merger or an Acquisition.
Choosing a right partner for marriage is like playing a Russian Roulette game. It is a game in which a guy puts a single bullet in a revolver and spins the chamber. He puts the gun to his head, pulls the trigger and hopes that the bullet won't fire.
It is surprising that most Indian men are ignorant of the marital laws before they get married. It is contrary to the manner in which most do extensive research before coming to any decision (be it buying a car or a smart phone or an apartment). They don't realize that the system has been rigged to favor the wives.
A man would be called a Mama's Boy if he listens to his mother or henpecked (Jhoru Ka Ghulam) if he listens to his wife. Any action resulting from the husband's mother due to her love for her son will be considered as an interference in her son's marital life. The same doesn't apply to the wife's mother, whose actions are fine even though she may be wrecking her daughter's marital life.
What will the man end up doing as both the terms (Mama's Boy, Jhoru Ka Ghulam) are demeaning?
The focus on education from childhood so that one can lead a better life shouldn't be discarded for ameliorating the marital blues, encountered during the adult phase. Indian men have no qualms in accepting a woman who is less educated than them or as equal to them or more than them as their partner. Only 25% of women accept men who are less educated than them as per the study conducted by University of Oxford.
The best option for an Indian man is Not to Marry, enabling him to live a life free of the in-house legal trouble (nothing but legal terrorism, state sponsored extortion). Few men can choose to Marry Up and try to lead a blissful marital life. The majority will succumb to the societal pressure and Marry Down and will realize that marriage is a crime for a man in India. Mera Bharat Mahaan!!!
A boy growing up in India often keeps hearing - Study Hard, Play Hard, Work Hard - You will have a great life! The first priority always being studies.
Once the boy starts earning and is doing well in his career, the inevitable question comes. When are you going to marry and settle down in life? The societal pressure won't stop until the boy marries. Most of the Indian movies used to end with a wedding with the implicit assumption of the couple living happily ever after. Nobody shows the life after marriage. There is a Hindi saying that marriage is like Shaadi ka ladoo jo na khaaye woh pachtaye, jo khaaye woh bhi pachtaaye!
Few even describe a marriage as that of being a Merger and not an Acquisition in management terminology. What happens in reality? The reality is far from it either being a Merger or an Acquisition.
Choosing a right partner for marriage is like playing a Russian Roulette game. It is a game in which a guy puts a single bullet in a revolver and spins the chamber. He puts the gun to his head, pulls the trigger and hopes that the bullet won't fire.
It is surprising that most Indian men are ignorant of the marital laws before they get married. It is contrary to the manner in which most do extensive research before coming to any decision (be it buying a car or a smart phone or an apartment). They don't realize that the system has been rigged to favor the wives.
A man would be called a Mama's Boy if he listens to his mother or henpecked (Jhoru Ka Ghulam) if he listens to his wife. Any action resulting from the husband's mother due to her love for her son will be considered as an interference in her son's marital life. The same doesn't apply to the wife's mother, whose actions are fine even though she may be wrecking her daughter's marital life.
What will the man end up doing as both the terms (Mama's Boy, Jhoru Ka Ghulam) are demeaning?
- End up becoming Jhoru Ka Ghulam at the cost of his well-being for sustaining or saving the marriage and may also have to distance himself from his parents and siblings.
- Stand up to the irrational demands of the wife and then face the various false cases (IPC 498a, DV and a bouquet of cases) which can be easily filed by his wife, thanks to the misuse prone, gender biased laws. It will take years for him to get acquittal due to the huge judicial pendency.
The focus on education from childhood so that one can lead a better life shouldn't be discarded for ameliorating the marital blues, encountered during the adult phase. Indian men have no qualms in accepting a woman who is less educated than them or as equal to them or more than them as their partner. Only 25% of women accept men who are less educated than them as per the study conducted by University of Oxford.
The best option for an Indian man is Not to Marry, enabling him to live a life free of the in-house legal trouble (nothing but legal terrorism, state sponsored extortion). Few men can choose to Marry Up and try to lead a blissful marital life. The majority will succumb to the societal pressure and Marry Down and will realize that marriage is a crime for a man in India. Mera Bharat Mahaan!!!
Very well drafted
ReplyDeleteIt is very hard for men in India.
Boycott marriage
to teach them the value of marriage and men (पति-परिवार)